Catherine's Advice
by SG1Happy
Summary: Ernest is gone and Catherine has something to say to Jack.


The first aching notes of "Taps" lifted into the cloudless summer sky, signaling the formal pageantry of a hero's funeral was almost complete. A tear slid down Samantha Carter's cheek, at odds with her composed face and dress blue uniform. She would miss this kind and gentle scholar. Even more, her heart hurt for Catherine. The older woman had loved Ernest so long, their time together so short. From the corner of her eye, Sam watched Colonel O'Neill, his stoic face carved from stone, his eyes hidden behind dark glasses. Sam gave a soft sigh at the similarity between herself and Catherine, surprised when the Colonel glanced down at her, a brow lifted in question. 

Shaking her head, Sam turned her attention back as Catherine accepted the carefully folded flag and hugged it to her chest, heavy diamond wedding rings glinting on her hand. With Daniel's help, the older woman rose from her chair. Holding the flag in one arm, she rubbed a hand across the top of the casket. "Good-bye, my love," she whispered. Turning and taking Daniel's arm, she walked away.

Clenching her hand, Sam thought, it wasn't enough. Fifty years the man had been stranded on a barren planet. No other human contact. Fifty years the US Government pretended that Ernest Livingston had died when he had disappeared through the Stargate in 1945. The major turned away from the gravesite, fiercely glad Ernest hadn't died alone and forgotten on P3X? Glad, too, that he and Catherine, after so many years apart, had the joy of being newlyweds.  
Fifty years Catherine had mourned the love of her life, never marrying, devoting her life to unlocking the secrets of the ancient stone circle. Sam closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Life was damned unfair sometimes. She knew she was no longer thinking only of Ernest and Catherine.

The wake was in full swing by the time Jack O'Neill tapped on the front door. He wasn't surprised to see Daniel open the door, his face solemn. In the four years Ernest had lived on Earth, Daniel had been more than a son to Ernest and Catherine.

"Jack." Daniel blocked the doorway for an instant, his face set. Then, his expression softening, he gestured Jack inside. "Catherine was just asking about you."

"Yeah, well— Jack slid his hands in his pockets and shifted his feet. "I'm sorry I'm so late." It was the truth. Facing all this grief wasn't his idea of fun, but shirking his duty had never been one of Jack O'Neill's faults.

"You're here now." Daniel laid a hand on Jack's shoulder, steering him into the living area. "Catherine will appreciate that." Daniel gave Jack's shoulder a squeeze and dropped his hand. The doorbell chimed again and Daniel turned toward it. "Teal'c and Sam are here somewhere."

Jack gave a curt nod and scanned the room. The house had once belonged to Catherine's father and her grandfather before that. Antiques with gleaming finishes were scattered across the polished hardwood floors. Exotic treasures of a life well lived graced many of the surfaces. A cozy seating area grouped around the marble fireplace.  
Most of the people here he recognized from the SGC. Teal'c and General Hammond conversed in a far corner, both lifting a glass in greeting. Jack began to make his way through the people toward them. Teal'c never looked comfortable in civilian clothes, especially with a hat pulled low over his forehead to hide his First Prime insignia. The general looked more like a teddy bear in civilian clothes than the tough two star he was. Jack shook his head, he knew both images of the general were accurate. Sam was nowhere to be seen.

"Jack"

He turned, smiling as Catherine made her way toward him, her hands outstretched. Against her maroon dress, the Eye of Ra necklace glinted golden in the soft light.

"Catherine." Grief slammed into him again as he folded her into his embrace. Her dynamic personality made him forget what a small woman she was. Pulling back, he studied her. White hair waved around a handsome face. Even grief couldn't dim the intelligence and shrewdness of her blue eyes, though he could see signs of recent tears there. Well into her eighties, he still had the uncomfortable feeling she could out work him any day.

Slipping from his arms, Catherine patted his cheek with her hand. "Don't be sad, Jack. I thought he died fifty four years ago. These past four years with Ernest have been a treasure."

"He was a good man, Catherine. He didn't deserve to get left behind."

"I'll agree with you there. Thank you for bringing him home." Catherine tucked her arm through Jack's tugging him toward the couch. "Sit with an old woman a minute."

Jack snorted a laugh.

"I will if you can find one."

Catherine smiled as she settled herself on the couch, then sobered.

"I am feeling old today." Catherine held out both of her hands, taking Jack's as he ranged beside her on the couch.

"I know. " Jack felt every one of his years today, wishing he could undo time.

Catherine leaned forward to peer into Jack's downturned face.

"Ernest loved you like a son."

Jack shook his head with a smile. "No. Daniel was that to him."

Catherine smiled. "If we'd had our fifty years together Ernest and I would have had many sons. Don't you think we could have loved more than one?"

Jack blinked. He'd never thought of his relationship with them that way.  
Catherine waved a hand. "You are right about Daniel. They were two of a kind, those two. Always their noses in a book, wanting to know everything. But he loved and respected you, Jack." "Thank you." Jack kept his eyes on where his hands were clasped by Catherine's gnarled ones. Unfamiliar emotions swirled in his chest. "Ernest wanted me to give you this." She reached into her pocket.

Jack was stunned to see her pull out a pocket watch, the chain dangling from her fingers. He remembered seeing it in Ernest own hands.

She pressed the watch into his palm, closing his fingers around it.

"Catherine, I can't-" Emotion trembled in his voice.

"Of course you can." Catherine wiped her eyes. "You will not argue with an old woman will you?"

Jack leaned in to kiss her cheek.

"I will if I can find one." He sat back, feeling the heavy watch in his palm.

Taking a deep breath, Catherine continued.

"There is an inscription."

Carefully, Jack opened the watch.

Yours for all time.

Speechless, Jack raised his eyes to Catherine's drenched ones. A watery half-smile trembled on her lips. Memories swam in her eyes.

"I gave it to Ernest right before he disappeared 1945.' A gentle laugh worked through her voice. "I worked and saved all summer to buy that watch. It was in his things…after… my father let me keep it. I gave it back to Ernest when we came home from PX3? Catherine sighed. "Even if I'd had fifty years with him instead of just four, it would never have been enough. There was never anyone one else for me. Or for him either."

Jack dropped his gaze, shaking his head, afraid of where this was going.

Catherine gripped his hands, drawing his eyes back to hers.

"Jack, what are you waiting for? I've watched you watch her. If you love her even a little bit like I loved Ernest, it is too precious to throw away."

Awareness of General Hammond standing in the corner with Teal'c thrummed down his spine. The man might look like a teddy bear in civvies, but Hammond was still his commanding officer and would come down like an avalanche on him if he broke frat regs with a certain Major.

"I don't know what you're talking ab-"

"Nonsense. You know exactly who I'm talk-" "Catherine, you know it can't happen. It's against regulations." Klaxons rang in his head. Danger. He needed to move, to get out. The watch chain slipped and swung from his hand.

"Bull." Catherine held him fast.

Surprised Jack just stared at her.

"The Jack O'Neill I know, knows how and when to break the rules." Catherine cocked an eyebrow. "Otherwise Abydos would be a nuclear wasteland and Earth would be a Goa'uld stronghold."

Jack shook his head. "To save the planet, Catherine. This…" Jack's mouth was dry as the sands of Abydos. To tread this close to the line, to all but admit his feelings for Carter was dangerous, even if it was only to Catherine. "This is not up to me…." From the corner of his eye he saw Sam bringing in a tray for the buffet table from the kitchen. Dressed in slim slacks and a soft sweater, she didn't look much like his kickbutt 2IC.

Gathering the dangling watch chain, she pressed it into his hand again.  
"Why isn't it up to you, Jack? Have you ever told her how you feel? Without a zay'tarc machine and an audience?" Jack stared, his pulse pounding in his ears. "Do the words courts martial mean anything to you?" Catherine's soft face was intent, her blue eyes compassionate but firm.

"Ernest wanted you to remember that life is too short. Love, real love is too precious to waste." She leaned forward, tapping a manicured nail on the pocket watch in his hand. "All those years ago, Ernest put his research and his work before what he felt for me. The result was being stranded away from me for fifty years. Don't you waste this moment, Jack O'Neill. Ernest would be mightily disappointed in you."

With that, Catherine patted his knee and rose, leaving a very confused Colonel on her couch.

Time heavy in his hand.


End file.
